Day of Love

Here's some visual chocolate...

just a few things I thought were funny that popped up in my news feed today!

My Valentine's Day went pretty well...

I treated myself with chocolate and sugar for the first time since doing the Whole 30 back in January. Yum!!

This chocolate is amazing. And so is the macademia/brazil nut butter. And so was the cocoa cashew butter. :)

The hubby sucked it up and took me to Serious Burger. He doesn't really like it that much, but between the whole birthday thing and Valentine's Day thing, he obliged. :)

It was delicious! :)

Happy Valentine's Day!

Risk

There has been a thought that keeps coming to me... about life in general, love, and especially lifting. I've been tossing the words around in my brain for the last month or so, but finally settled on these:

The greater the risk, the greater the chance for disappointment in failure, but also greater the depth joy in success.

In lifting terms, there's a great amount of risk to loading up heavy weight on the bar and deadlifting. The risk of failure is pretty great. There is a slight risk of hurting yourself physically. There's a risk of failing the lift and hurting your pride. But if you take the risk and succeed, your happiness is uncontrollable. Such joy.

In cooking, it's sometimes a risk to try new recipes or spice combinations. And sometimes things don't work out. But when they do, you find out you actually love green beans. And squash soup. Who knew?

In love, it's a great risk to open up your heart completely to another person. There are so many examples of heart-breaking failure. We humans get in our own way so much. We mess things up and make mistakes. There's a greater chance for disappointment. But when love works out, how wonderful and incredible it is. The joy is incomparable.


As as it applies to lifting, I have known failure. It is crushingly defeating to fail a lift that I completed the week before. But those successful days... there are few things on earth that bring that kind of elation.

And as always in life, it seems there are just enough disappointments and failures to keep us soft and compassionate of others, but enough sweetness and success to make it worth it.

I originally posted this picture a long time ago... and I still love it. :) I created the image with roflbot.

Mariah and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

.... or in other words, my birthday last week.

Let's call them birthday surprises.

Started off with a funny one: running out of toilet paper. Lovely.

Then Aunt Flo made her presence known. That bugger is always early for our appointments.

Unfortunately, that skewed things for my body fat test, measurements, etc. later that morning at the gym.

Speaking of the gym, I dropped a 65-pound, loaded bar on my shin. It was pleasant. Note to self: do NOT lose concentration at the bottom of an overhead squat.

It's still pretty painful. But, on a side note, my sweet Adistars were my early birthday present a few months ago. :) I love them.

After the gym, I stopped by the grocery store to pick up a few things. I stepped in a super deep puddle by accident and found out my little suede boots were the opposite of waterproof. Freezing cold, sloshy socks... brr.

And on the way home from the store, I managed to hit a massive pothole on the highway. Literally, there was a chunk of the road missing. Thankfully, I wasn't traveling highway speed because it was a bit snowy/slushy. Regardless, the tire was flat within a quarter mile, or by the time I made it down the offramp of our exit.

Thankfully, I have a hubby that loves me. He was there within 25 minutes, swapped out the snow tire/rim with one of our summer tires/rims in a couple minutes, and I was on my way home. Nothing like eating lunch at 2:30!

We also got the snow tire replaced yet that afternoon, which was great... except for the massive pothole sized dent it left in our checkbook. ;)

The rest of the day went a little bit more smoothly with only a broken lock button on my phone to finish the day off.

I might have done some lounging around in yoga pants that evening. :) And ate bacon. Hey, I'm only human.

Good thing it was my birthday... all the Facebook posts, messages, texts and the few phone calls really brightened my day. :)

And thank goodness my birthday only comes once a year! Phew!

Marriage, as told by kids

I read this on Facebook... and chuckled the whole way through. Thought I would share. :)

1. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)
-You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10

-No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
-- Kristen, age 10

2. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
-- Camille, age 10

3. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
-- Derrick, age 8

4. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids.
-- Lori, age 8

5. WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
-Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
-- Lynnette, age 8
(isn't she a treasure)

-On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
-- Martin, age 10

6. WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
-When they're rich.
-- Pam, age 7

-The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
- - Curt, age 7

-The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
- - Howard, age 8

7. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
-- Anita, age 9 (bless you child )

8. HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
-- Kelvin, age 8

And the #1 Favorite is.......

9. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck.
-- Ricky, age 10

A Memory Lapse

Do you have memory lapses?

As in, large chunks of your life that you just don't remember?

I started to get scared in the last few weeks as it dawned on me that I literally do not remember large portions of my life during college. It isn't like it has been ages and ages ago...

Oh, I remember the big things. Getting married, meeting Justin's girlfriend for the first time, people staying at our sweet little apartment with us, buying different vehicles, locking keys in vehicles, bitter cold winters, weekends spent at both of our parents' houses, passing my Photoshop semester exam with the only 50/50 score in the history of the class, special events... the big things are easy.

But the daily life. I don't remember normal daily life.

What did I eat for breakfast? What did I do with all my time? Why did I only get together with my awesome college buddies 3-4 times during the two years I was there? Why is everything a blur? Did I even sleep at all? And then, how did I survive before coffee?

It's these little things that I wish I could remember.

As I was looking for something last week, I stumbled upon my old planners from college.

Heh. And now I understand why I don't remember the daily life. I understand why it's just a blur of madness interrupted by weekends.

5-6 classes per semester, usually in the mornings, with 2-3 shooting assignments a week. Shooting assignments included buying film, renting the Blad cameras, shooting the assignment, processing film, developing prints, completing the paperwork, and turning it in. That's assuming everything went as planned, and you didn't have to re-shoot. ;)

Then, I worked at the bank about 30-hours a week... which works out to almost every afternoon/evening and some Saturdays.

Plus, all the other "things" in life... including wedding planning in the first few months of school and then being newly married.

Wow. Crazy business. I was literally busy from 7 in the morning until midnight.

It's no wonder I could fall asleep at any given moment.

What is a wonder is how my incredible husband put up with me... :)



Anyway, I don't mean to give the impression of doom and gloom. When I think back, there are so many happy memories. Lots of love and laughter accompanied the stress. Some of the best years of my life!

It really makes me appreciate the daily life I have now. Who would have thought in just a few years, I would be setting and controlling, to an extent, my own schedule? Who would have thought I would be a business owner... for three years already?

It also makes me stop and take note every once in a while: this is what's happening. This is what your life is like. Right now. Enjoy it.

I even still keep a planner... Well, two actually. Some habits are hard to break. ;) They are mostly to keep track of how I spend my time for business purposes and for setting appointments.

But, also, so I'll be able to look back once I forget (probably will be sooner rather than later) and remember. This is what my days were like. This is what I enjoyed.

And it will make me happy.

January and February... the roller coaster ride.

 Happy day of love! I thought this was fitting for today.... Does anyone else love Pinterest?? Completely. Addicted.
 

Source: theamateurwriter.com via Mariah on Pinterest

Nothing special in the romance department around here, just a normal day and a couple of really sweet cards. :)


The more life goes on, the more I am thankful I have my wonderful man.





-----------------------------------------------------------------

I know it's been ages since I've posted. Quite honestly, I've been going through a pretty rough patch lately as I've been dealing with some sort of hip injury/issue. It's really been affecting my workouts, as I can't do anything cardio-related, or squats, or deadlifts, or lunges, or everything else with my legs that's fun. That has led to some pretty interesting and fairly dark mental issues.

As you all might know, or have guessed by now, working out and eating right has become quite the obsession for me. I expect very few people will understand, but I'll try to explain a little more. The last year has been difficult for me. However, it didn't matter what my mental status was, or what I was dealing with, I could always head to the gym and be strong. My body was strong... not always in shape, but able to do what was asked of it. As a result, the gym has become my happy place. It's where I can turn my phone on airplane mode, lift heavy weights, and do crazy WOD's that include multiple rounds of burpees, pushups, running, squats, powercleans, etc.

So, as I've battled this injury with my hips in the last few weeks, it's been a roller coaster of emotions. All of a sudden, my body isn't strong anymore; in fact, it was quite weak. My mind, so used to depending on my body to be strong, didn't know what to do. I was ashamed of myself for not being able to perform, for having to do jogging intervals at 5.0 mph rather than sprinting intervals at 9.5 from the week before. Ashamed to be using "machines with chairs" while longingly looking at the squat racks. I went from November/December last year of hitting PR's (personal records) nearly every week in something or other, to completely cutting out entire portions of my workouts. I felt very frustrated and broken, and let's say it was a very good lesson in dealing with my shattered pride. Nothing like leaving the gym nearly in tears every day to take away some of that happy place feeling.

Fortunately, I've gained my upper body strength back as I still can work those muscles. I've been joking about finally becoming ripped on my upper body, as my legs have always been strong. My trainer has me finally convinced that no, in fact, I'm NOT broken. He even let me do a few things I probably shouldn't have just to prove that point, for which I'm grateful.

Yes, the realization has come to me and has finally sunk in that my body just needs to heal. Acceptance is always the last step, right? ;) I have been taking it easy, cutting out nearly everything cardio, taking lots of precautionary measures like stretching (goodness, I'll be able to do the splits by the end of this... both ways!), using ice/heat therapy (hello ice bath, NEVER again).

Like I said, I don't expect many to understand this crazy competition I have with myself. Some people have tried to offer comfort by telling me to look back and remember where I started. Oh boy, do I remember... but there's no way I'm stopping now. I'm too busy looking ahead! I don't want to settle for just plain good, or even great.

I will say this, like any other long-term struggle I seem to go through, it usually does wonders for my faith and strength in God. Sometimes I ponder that if it didn't take such extremes for me to learn the lesson, I might have an easier time in life....?

This is another great "pin" I have in one of my Pinterest boards:

Source: babaloud.com via Mariah on Pinterest

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Anyway on to the next part... Food!!



-----------------------------------------------------------------

Tonight I tried something new... a take off a recipe I found on Pinterest, where else? :)

I realized as I found the link again and read through the recipe, that I really just grabbed the idea from here http://www.marksdailyapple.com/crispy-nut-and-herb-fried-chicken-with-creamy-avocado/ and not much else. :)

I'd been wanting to use up some of my flax meal for awhile, so that made up the majority of the "breading."

I've also been off chicken for awhile, so wanted to try the recipe with turkey breasts instead. I really like these turkey breast cutlets, as they're thin and cook super quick. I hate waiting for food to cook. Me want food! Me want food now! :)

With chicken breasts, I would recommend pounding them or something. On the original recipe link, the author says that nuts smell really bad when they burn (?), so if after a few minutes the meat isn't cooked through, pop the pan in a preheated 350*oven for a few minutes once the outside is nice and crispy.

I probably wouldn't go with all olive oil for frying next time either... I like olive oil, but not too big on the taste. Now, butter. That makes everything better. Butter. Better. It's meant to be.

So, without further ado, here's the recipe for my homemade
Parmesan-Crusted Turkey Breasts:

Heat pan, add oil/fat of choice (I used olive, but probably will go butter in the future)

Combine:

Italian seasoning
Oregano
Onion powder
Parmesan, small amount (otherwise will burn in the pan)
Ground flax seeds/meal
Ground/finely chopped almonds or almond meal (I actually liked having a few crunchy almond pieces in there!)
Salt
Chopped garlic (which I didn't think to add, but yum, wouldn't that be good?!)
2 eggs, or however many you need to make it into a sticky paste of sorts

Rub mixture on both sides
Throw them in the pan for 2-ish minutes on each side

Garnish with more parmesan

And, devour!

If I were more on top of things, I would serve with marinara and pasta, at least for the hubby to enjoy. The turkey had a very yummy American/Italian flavor.

As always, please excuse my lack of measurements. When in doubt, add more. That's pretty much my life's motto anyway. Life's too short to spend time measuring in recipes!



-----------------------------------------------------------------

Hope you had a
Happy Valentine's Day!

2010 Wrap-up

1. What did you do in 2010 that you'd never done before?
Started an official business. Left my "office" job.

2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I usually don't make New Years resolutions.. it's a crutch people lean on. Rather, I do goal-setting throughout the year. heh.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Well, no sisters or sisters-in-law. Some ladies in the extended family did. :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Grandpa Baseman

5. What countries did you visit?
USA. Hah.

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?
More self confidence in standing up for myself and my business.
Clients, in general. ;)

7. What date from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
1.4.10. The day of Joel's accident. Ironically, 1 year from today exactly. That's the first time in my life I've ever truly lost my appetite.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting my business up and running... including an official business plan. And my weddings. Looove my weddings. :)

9. What was your biggest failure?
Hard to say. I'm pretty tough on myself. This year has taught me a lot of lessons about planning ahead, planning for the unexpected, valuing myself, my talent, and the hard work it's taken to get where I am now.

On a lighter note, my addiction to coffee. :)

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Not me personally. Wait. I had that thing with the heart operation... WPW syndrome. I'm all good now.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Whooeee. My lens. 24-70mm 2.8L. Love it. Also my recent purchase of CS5, as well as all my computer upgrades this year. Totally worth it... I love Win7!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My cousin, Karlene. The relationship we've created over the last 10 months has by far exceeded what I've ever expected in a relative, friend, and client. Thank you from the bottom of my heart; you have no idea how much I appreciate you and our time together! You've been incredible to get to know! :)

Also, my husband. He lives with me every day and still loves me to death. :D

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Oh, you mean the situation that caused my heart to pound, sleep to fail me, and ruined my appetite for Annie's Organic mac'n'cheese? ;) We won't go there.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Sheesh. Everywhere. Bills, mostly. Loans. This year was big for medical bills.. Food, supplements, computer equipment/software/etc... My business. ;)

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The surprise Joel planned for my birthday.
Business marketing and planning. Sad, but true.
Also, being able to tackle things head on, money-wise.
I get really excited about date nights with my hubby. :)

16. What song will always remind you of 2010?
Probably that Celtic Woman one, "Fields of Gold." Makes me think of Georgia, the lake house, being in the boat, and hanging out with Suz. :) Brings back happy memories.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier, yet more realistic. Maybe stoic.
ii. thinner or fatter? Heh. I think about the same for once.
iii. richer or poorer? Feel richer, but as numbers go, I'm not sure. Maybe secure is a good word.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Reaching out to others.
Laughing.
Singing.
Breathing.
Preparing.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Whining.
Complaining.
Nagging.
Worrying.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
My family! Eating, playing games, and laughing, of course.

22. Did you fall in love in 2010?
It's funny. Seem to be deeper in love with every day passing... how does that work?! If it keeps getting better, being old must rock... love wise. :)

23. How many one-night stands?
365. With the same man. ;)

24. What was your favorite TV program?
The Office, How I Met Your Mother, Modern Family, Grey's, Private Practice

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Who actually "hates" people?

26. What was the best book you read?
I don't think I read a single book this year. How sad... I used to read 2-3 books a week!

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Celtic Woman. Hands down. Plus I love that I found The Dimes and Wiretree through Animoto.

28. What did you want and get?
My business.
I'm a pretty determined person, though.. usually find a way to get things I want.

29. What did you want and not get?
Determined.. but satisfied. I can't really think of anything at the moment. Probably for dear hubby to not work out of town so much.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
That comedy guy, Gabriel Iglesias... that cracked me up.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
21, Joel planned a surprise weekend in LaCrosse with my mom and dad. It was gloriously fun!

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
2 less accidents, a bazillion less medical bills, and working 14-hour days due to clients banging down my door.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?
Hah. Clearance racks. Random, bright color. Hair flowers. T-shirts. Hoodies. Double layer socks.

34. What kept you sane?
That certain someone and our pudder. Preferably together.
Music.
Retail therapy.


35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Me? Pay attention to celebrities or public figures? Pay attention to any current events at all? Hardly.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
The elections this year. The health insurance thing rubs me the wrong way.

37. Who did you miss?
My Hawkeye buddies. :(

38. Who was the best new person you met?
Probably my best friend's boyfriend... because he makes her happy, and she deserves that. :)

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010:
Don't allow others to take advantage of you or perceive your expertise for less than it is.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"Does it get any better than this?
We're into something beautiful.
Bein' with you's as good as it gets.
It doesn't get any better than this!"

Better Than This ~ Kimberley Locke

Dangers of working in a bathroom.

Heh.

Thought this day would never come.

Ladies and gentlemen,

Presenting Joel and Mariah's wedding album. 2.5 years after the fact.

Amazing images by Christopher's Photography, album design by yours truly.


I'll be ordering this by the end of the week... so let me know if you have any tips or suggestions! I must say, I've probably re-done each page about 7-8 times, and am pretty happy with it now.

However, as I'm a perfectionist, there's always room for improvement, right? :)

Enjoy.

Oh yes.

I forgot to mention before I left... we had our 2nd anniversary on Dec 21st last year.

Our present to each other was the dog earlier... so no big gifts to each other on the day of. :)

Joy and sorrow interwoven...

... love in all I see.

As you all who read this probably know, this last week has been the most trying week of my life. I don't usually post extremely personal stuff on my blog and bare my mental issues to everyone, but I suppose I can make an exception. (Yes, I do roll my eyes at you, if you bare your soul on your Facebook status.) I think it's because I'm pretty private about my feelings, which is why you might wonder if I had any emotion as you read this. Don't worry, it's very raw still. And hidden from you. Anyway. This is going to be a book, so bear with me.

Brenton Wade Salyers, 23 years old, the perfect husband and soulmate for my best friend, Cheree (Coffman) Salyers, passed away July 4th, while we were down visiting them in Houston, Texas. As it ended up, I was the only one at the hospital when his heart slowed, and finally stopped beating late afternoon. Joel was back at their rented apartment down in Houston, and arrived just minutes afterward.

They were married last year on May 31st, and shortly afterward found out that he had melanoma spread throughout his body. At that time, it was present in his brain, lungs, and lymph nodes. They agressively treated it with chemo, as Brenton was quite healthy and strong.

By and by, this spring he had brain surgery to get most of what he had left in his brain. However, it had spread to the rest of his body, especially his abdomen where it was attacking his bowel and stomach. They were going to start a new treatment throughout the summer called immunotherapy. Essentially it overstimulates the immune system to fight off the cancer. They rented an apartment in Houston and moved down there for the summer because he was to spend a week in the hospital, and 2 weeks out for the duration of the summer.

We had wanted to see them for quite a while now, and it just worked out for us to go down there over the 4th. Cheree picked us up from the airport on Friday the 3rd, and we spent the evening with them at their apartment. Brenton was resting in the bedroom, so we didn't get a chance to see him until Saturday.

Saturday morning, she was up with him around 4, I guess he was restless and was having difficulties breathing. He'd had quite a bit of fluid buildup in his lungs, so Cheree had to drain it every day. About 7, she poked her head in our door and said they were going to the hospital. What she didn't tell us is that he had tripped over a pillow on the floor, and she was concerned because it wasn't normal for him to be that weak so they were going to the ER.

We were up later and getting ready when I realized that she had left her phone at the apartment. We didn't have a vehicle and no way to get a hold of them and find out what was going on. Through a bunch of phone calls, we finally got a hold of some of the friends, John and Andrea Smith, who were on their way into the hospital. They brought us in, and we headed straight up to the ICU.

When she brought him in, his bp was 70/30, so they rushed him up to ICU and finally stabilized him around noon. He wasn't able to take any pain meds because they wanted to do some scans if they could, which they never ended up doing because he wasn't really stable enough yet. We got Cheree to eat a few bites for lunch, and then Joel and I took her back to the apt to freshen up and get away for a bit.

Joel dropped Ree and I at the hospital and went back to wash some sheets and towels for Esther and Liz and Gary that were on their way by that time. Shortly after we arrived back at the hospital, the Smiths had to leave. Cheree wasn't in the room with Brenton at that time, so I went in there with him for a bit while he was getting a mammogram to look at some of the different organs in his abdomen.

I was waiting outside the room when I saw Cheree come back with a group of doctors. I think it was somewhere between 4:00-4:30.. I can't remember. She came straight to me and said that the doctors didn't think he would make it through the night. I guess he was building up acid in his blood which means his organs were starting to fail. Also, his catheter bag was mostly blood and very little urine. His abdomen was just huge and swollen. The doctors wouldn't have known for sure if it was air, blood, or fluid building up in there without doing surgery, which he wasn't able for.

After holding on to each other bawling our eyes out for a while, she got herself put together a little bit and went in to talk to Brenton. I'm kind of fuzzy on the details of the next hour or so, but I know I was in there for awhile as well.

All of a sudden Brenton got really antsy and fidgety. He started taking his oxygen mask off and said he wanted to get up. He needed to walk around, he said. He made motions like he was going to start pulling IV's off, so I ran and got the nurse, who convinced him to settle down a bit. I just stayed outside the room, because I don't know if he was that comfortable with me being there.

The nurse left and before I knew it, Cheree ran out yelling for help because his heart rate was dropping. The nurse paged something into an intercom, and all of a sudden there were 10 doctors/nurses around. I quick called Joel and think I said, "Get here now!" and hung up the phone.

The next thing is what I see over and over in my head. Cheree and I were holding each other, and one of the nurses grabs her, and throws her into the room, telling her that she needed to be there with him. And then his heart stopped.

After a few seconds, I decided she didn't need to be alone in the room. I don't know how long we were bent over him, nearly hysterical, but it seemed like a millasecond and forever at the same time.

We left to let them clean him up, take the iv's off, etc., met Joel, went to the waiting room, warded off a chaplain who was awkward and took a page in the middle of everything, talked to a doctor who was new to the case that didn't really have any news, and went back in the room to say another goodbye.

We stood by as Cheree opened her Bible and read for a bit. I'm so proud of the strength that she showed. Both her and Brenton loved and served the Lord with everything they had. God gave her strength that I don't think I've ever seen before. I asked her as we were leaving if she wanted another moment alone before we left. I'll just quote her exactly: "No, it's just his body.... I loved his body, but there was so much more than that."

All the tv shows and movies show the height of the action in ER cases and the commotion of surgeries gone wrong, etc. What no one ever shows and tells you, is the waiting. The long stretches of silence in the waiting rooms. The looks from one person to another. The way your body is still and your mind is racing while numb at the same time.

We went back to the apartment then. We just sat, looked at each other, and waited. Waited for something. I don't know what. Maybe some kind of relief from the mental anguish.

And that's when the hymn popped into my mind. "Precious thought, my Father knoweth, Careth for his child. Biddeth me to nestle closer, when the storm beats wild, Though my earthly hopes be shattered and the tear drops fall, Yet He is Himself my solace, yea, my All in All." and then the very last thought of that hymn: "Joy and sorrow interwoven, love in all I see." The joy in their lives, and the sorrow in his death, and yet so much love. Love for each other, love for the Lord, for their families.

Brenton had so much love for others, especially Cheree. When we were gone after lunch, John (Smith) was in the room with Brenton when a doctor came in. They were talking about his chances of living, and Brenton just held up a hand and said, "Stop." He said he knew how bad his situation was, and he was just worried about his wife. "Take care of her," he said. Such love.

Cheree's mom, Esther, arrived in Houston at 10:00, and she got to the apartment by taxi at quarter to 11. Liz and Gary, (Brenton's folks), his brother Shane, and sister Ashley, arrived at quarter to 12. The workers in their field in Missouri also came down, stayed in a motel, and came to the apartment the next morning.

We all sat around Sunday morning as funeral plans were made, memories were shared, and last wishes were expressed. After lunch, they were able to get Brenton's body to one of the funeral homes in the area that allowed for a viewing for the families, since they weren't able to see him in the hospital.

Afterwards, we all headed back to the apartment and packed up all Cheree's stuff. The workers left first at around 5, the Salyers around 5:30, and finally Cheree and her mom at 7-ish.

That night was interesting for us, no transportation in a city we had no idea of and completely at the mercy of the Smiths to take us to the airport the next morning.

Anyway, we got home okay Monday night and the weekend was finally over.

We left for the funeral Wednesday morning around 7:30 and got down to the funeral home for the visitation about 6:30 in the evening. We stayed with the Townsends on the Clever convention grounds. We really enjoyed our time there, as they were super nice. We then left after the burial at 2:30 or so and got back home at 12:30 this morning.

As Cheree asked me Saturday night, is there no limit to the number of tears a person can cry?

Every effort Joel and I have put forth has been more than well worth it, and I realized that there really is no cost too great to be able to stand by a friend in need. But then again, I've never sat in a car for 21 hours just to "be there" for a friend.

I've also come to realize, as we heard in the funeral from Randy Satterfield, that these gifts that God has given to us are so precious. Every person and every relationship is a gift, and it's something God gives to us to enjoy our life.

Now that I'm mentally exhausted and once again, a nearly-blubbering sap, I'll let this be all.
I can't imagine the continued anguish of losing someone that you've so dearly loved, and it's made me so much more thankful for my wonderful husband (who is also willing to spend a hard weekend, go through hours of flying, and drive 21 hours for the best friend of his wife) and all the gifts that we share together.

Just a side note, I do have Cheree's address in Missouri if you would like it. However, I believe she'll be going back up to stay at her parents for a few weeks, so it might be better to send correspondance there.

Ketchup. Catch up. Catsup.

... not really the same ol' but nothing too exciting.

Last weekend was my cousin Shanna's wedding in Milwaukee. It was a beautiful place and a beautiful day. They had me fill in as photographer while she was getting dressed... so of course that gave me artistic license to bring my camera along for the rest of the day. :) Check out some of the pics on the other blog. We ended up staying an extra night for the "friends/family" picnic on Sunday, which worked out really well. The only room they had left was the whirlpool suite.. That was amazing. :)

Joel actually came home this Wednesday and I went back to the job with him on Thursday morning. I didn't want him to have to finish up alone.. :) Thursday night we stayed in this wonderful hotel, where the mattress springs were of the utmost quality. We know, we could feel them. We also sing the praises of the sound-enhancing walls... that t-storm was nearly in our room with us.

Whatever. :) Obviously I got my laundry machines (wooo...). Today, after a stop at Home Depot, Joel built me this awesome laundry "area" in the basement. It consists of some clotheslines and 2 8-ft rods to hang my clothes on. Yes. I'm anal. I hardly dry anything all the way. It's just beautiful. My last load of the day is just finishing up in the dryer. *sniff* *tear* I love my husband. :)

I'm supposed to hear back on the whole job situation (finally) next week. They called me last Friday (after I'd given up hope)... and Randy (the owner, main photog) was going to be out on vacation this current week, but told me he was interested, gave me a time frame, opened possibilities for part time work until they were ready for me full time. I called him back this week (oops, he was in South Carolina), and so we're going to chat sometime in the next few days about pay/starting dates/etc.

Ahhh. Finally. I'm still a little anxious about it though... not sure I want to drive 40 min (one way) for work, and wondering if they're going to be as lax about other things as they were getting back to me. I mean seriously, I started interviewing in the middle of May! As far as job description and duties, it's pretty much perfect.

So this is what I was waiting for. Hot, muggy weather. And now I wish for a/c. Something our plexer doesn't have. Le sigh. We spent most of today in our basement.

We got tickets to go down to Houston in July to visit Brenton and Cheree Salyers. She's my childhood best friend (which I haven't seen since her wedding, a little over a year ago!), and Brenton is from Missouri, which is actually where they live. Two months after they were married, they found out he had melanoma spread out through his body including brain, lungs, and lymph nodes. Through chemo and surgery, what was in his brain has shrunk, but the cancer has increased throughout the rest of his body. They're spending this whole summer down in Houston, where he's trying a new type of treatment (which I forgot the name of), which basically over-stimulates his immune system to attack the cancer. I can't imagine going through that much in your first year of marriage.. Anyway, it is long overdue for us to see them, so we decided we would do whatever it took to do just that. :)

That's pretty much everything I've got.. just don't kill any flies or PETA will breathe down your neck. I just killed two spiders this morning, eep, imagine the tirade of a bug bomb!

Hope you all have a wonderful Fathers' Day tomorrow!

365!

Our 1st anniversary today...

Hardly seems like a whole year gone by already. It's gone so fast but feels like we've been together for a long time.

Now, not to get all mushy, but it really has been the best year of my life.
There's no words to express the depth of love I have for Joel and I can't believe my luck to have found a life partner that is not only my best friend, but one that is faithful to the Lord and an encouragement to me every day.

A threefold cord is not quickly broken. :)

Here's to the second year (and many more to come); may it be even better than the 1st!

Our engagement picture used on our wedding invititations

The wedding kiss

Over Thanksgiving this year