Friday, July 31, 2009

Lions and tigers and interviews, oh my!

Another one yesterday. I was a little bit leery going in to the interview because she called me up and asked if I was still looking for an assistant position. I was like.. uh, yes. And she sounded all discombobulated on the phone. Well, she meant assistant for her as an insurance/investment broker. Which was fine, whatever.

I actually really had a great time there getting to know her (I was there from 11:30 until 1!), and if she was a photographer instead of insurance broker, this would be everything I'm looking for in a boss. Sigh. Our personalities meshed really well, considering they're very similar. :)

I think she really liked me, but she was very intuitive. She asked me 3-4 times what would happen if I took this job and 3,6, or more months down the road, a photography position opened up. Would I leave after all she'd invested in me to train me, etc...?? And I sat there with a stunned silence. Can a person BE more perceptive? I didn't know what to answer! I did say, though, that once I'm settled in a job that I really enjoy (eg. the library), I stick with it for a very long time. And she made it very clear that if I did take this job, I wasn't to actively seek photography employment or opportunities.. hm. However, she didn't think she was going to be able to promise me 40 hours a week.

So I'm sitting on this for awhile. I don't know what to think.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Long time coming...

but I finally got my blog list up and on here...

Check it out below for nearly all the blogs that I follow. :)

PS. Is this new bkg/colors combo working out for me?

Love this..

Free handwriting fonts...

Check it out!

Quote for the day

.... otherwise known as someone else's note to self.


"If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!"

P.J. O'Rourke

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Because I know..

.. how you're all on the edge of your seats waiting for news, I rushed home to post about my interview this morning. Oh wait. No rushing. And, yep, it's almost 4:00..

Well the actual interview went well... They're looking for mainly sales/photographer right now and they seemed to be impressed with everything I had to offer including my portfolio. They also have a studio in Manitowoc (gulp) that they need a position or two filled, so they're contemplating that. Yikes. That's an hour and 15 min one way...

Anyway, as I was leaving, I briefly explained my last interviewing experience with him and how they waited 2 months to make their final decision and so I was curious what my chances were (so I could get on with my life, if need be). He was up front with me and said that it's still 50/50.. because of what they're needing and how I can fit in to everything.

I'm trying hard to see this as a 'half full' experience, but I don't want to get my hopes up too far, because, well, you know.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Photo blog pics!




Getting my hopes up...

.. and sure hope they don't fall!!

Yesterday was great... meeting in the morning at Grandma and Grandpa Killam's place... with tons of visitors!! We also got to see Gene and Val, my great-uncle and aunt (my gpa's brother), from New Mexico. After lunch with them, I headed over to Wautoma to shoot a wedding with Nick... the photographer that I met on craigslist.

It was an awesome wedding. Beautiful yet relaxed. Both the bride and groom had two adorable girls.. each! And they played a beautiful part in the ceremony.

Anyway, on the way home last night, I got a call from a guy out of a studio in DePere. We chatted briefly.. about how he usually has 3-4 full timers on staff, and currently he only has 2... He would want me to start off in the sales portion of the studio, which I think would be good for me to get more confidant in my sales ability. Then he said that there would definitely be opportunity to shoot later on. So, he called me again this morning and we set up a meeting time tomorrow morning. (!!)

I'm not to get my hopes up too far, but at the same time, it would be soooo awesome to start my career in photography right away. I realized yesterday how much I love shooting and being with people. And then I think maybe there's a reason why I haven't been able to find anything else so far...?

Whatever. I just really hope something works out...

Friday, July 24, 2009

Fun times.

My fun friend (and another friend of hers from work) from HCC/Waterloo was here Wednesday... left Waterloo at 5, got up here at 10, spent the day here in the area.. I took them to Noodles and then we hung out at the mall until we met some of her other friends at TGIFridays for supper.. That was an awesome time, and then they left around 8 that night. Yes. To go back home. Craaazy.

But it was fun! And it really meant a lot that she (and her friend.. :D) came.




And ps. This is post #100 in 2009!!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Survey!!

1) Are you really ready for 101 questions? Heh.

2) Was your last kiss a mistake? Of course not.

3) Do you believe in God? Of course.

4) Who did you last say I love you to? Joel.

5) Do you regret it? Dear goodness, no.

6) What's your favorite BBQ'd food? Those little wienies.

7) Do you talk about your feelings or hide them? Depends.. on here I tend to talk about them more. In real life, I'm pretty much a closed book.

8) Are you the same person as you were at the beginning of 2008? letsee.. 2008. I was just married. So no.

9) Are you eating? just was. :)

10) How's your ex doing? Uhm.. that was a long time ago. As far as I know, all of them are doing good.

11) What did you last eat? my leftover mac'n'cheese

12) What are you listening to? my washer emptying water

13) What cell phone service do you use? alltel soon to be Verizon. sigh.

14) How's the weather? really nice. Sunny and 75 degrees.

15) Do you have an attitude? Sometimes.

16) Have you ever been in love? :)

17) How much do you text? Slim to none. Although I've been doing it more lately.

18) Like reading? that's kind of like "Like breathing?" or "Like sleeping?" for me.

19) Ever felt replaced? interesting. I guess.

20) Do you hate anyone at the moment? nope.

21) Twirl, or cut your spaghetti? I'm a reformed twirler and now I cut. :)

22) Who’s making you feel the way you are right now?uhm. myself? I'm just kind of here today. Fillin my time, wasting your oxygen.

23) When was your last family reunion? err. There's one coming up in August that I'm trying to see if I have other plans... ;)

24) Do you still have items that belong to your ex? Nope

25) How exactly are you feeling now? A little blah. Somewhat of a headache.

26) Ever ate food in a car while someone or yourself is driving? Duh.

27) Do you like anybody at the moment? Yup.

28) Do you have a best friend to lean on? I've got quite a few.. Joel, my mom, Joel's mom.. :)

29) Have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend? Actually, no. Well except with Joel. lol

30) Are Barbie & Ken bad influences on people? maybe. My barbies used to "go under the bed" LOL

31) Do you regret anything from your past? Not really. Everything's always worked out for the better so far.

32) What are you listening to right now? Already answered this.. :) And yes, the washing machine is still draining.

33) Do you want to have kids? Someday. Certainly not right now.

34) Ever kissed somebody who's name starts with an E? No. Random?

35) Do you type fast? Haha yes. I used to type really fast, but I've slowed down since I got out of hs.

36) Do you have piercings? nope.

37) Want any more piercings? nope.

38) Can you spell well? on good dayz

39) What do you miss the most about your past? having a job. :)

40) What are you craving right now? an ice cold mt dew... and there's some sitting up in the fridge.. maybe I should just go get some tomato juice. haha

41) Where were you doing Friday night? probably going to a visitation

42) Do you know someone that has feelings for you? I sure hope so.

43) Does somebody love you? He better. :)

44) What were you doing at 1 AM this morning? Just getting to sleep.

46) Where have you lived throughout your life? SD, IA (3 different places), WI

47) Last time you cried? Er. Um. Well. The other day when I was emotional and happened to see Cheree and Brenton's picture in our living room.

48) Do you think people talk about you? Sure. Any more pregnancy rumors going around yet? haha

49) How many kids do you wanna have? 2

50) Did you kiss or hug anyone today? no... not yet. :(

51) Something you hate more than anything? hangers. tangled hangers make me irate. that and other drivers.

52) Does the future make you more nervous or excited? excited.

53) What's on your wish list for your birthday? to be debt free? yeah right. I don't really know yet, probably paint to paint the walls here... and my piano tuned.

54) What are your favorite colors? sheesh. I don't really have favorites.. and it depends on what the color is on.

55) Do you have trust issues? not really

56) Have you ever had a pet fish? thank goodness, no

57) Has anyone ever given you roses? yes

58) Where did you get the shirt you're wearing? savers. :D

59) Do you have strong feelings for the last person you texted? Oh sure. I love Muddy. :)

60) Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Better than most, I think.

61) Are you seeing or talking to somebody? not at the moment. Oh, wait. Did you mean dating..

62) Do you care what your ex thinks about you? are you kidding me? whyfor?

63) Do you like filling out these long surveys or is it because you're bored? I'm procrastinating going to the grocery store and finish cleaning the house..

64) Your last ex calls and wants to talk, do you? sure. because it hasn't been 4 years. (sarcasm disclaimer)

65) Can you put on mascara without opening your mouth? when I actually have done this, no

66) Does your facebook password have to do with a girl? uhm no.

67) What was the last movie you watched, with? a really stupid one. He's just not that into you.. with Muddy.

68) Have you ever walked outside in the rain? kind of.

69) Do you think you are a good person? the best. haha

70) Do you believe everything happens for a reason? of course

71) What did you do last night? watched a movie

72) Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends how they felt after the first time

73) What does your mouse pad look like? something about Madison and that one thing Joel always goes to with the Lewis'..

74) What brand of computer do you use? Pc.. forever.

75) Do you play the Wii? I wish.

76) How do you feel about WalMart? eh. They're cheap, but for a reason. So I just get some basic things at walmart and the rest at other places..

77) How are you? sigh. We've already covered this.

78) Who has inspired you the most? Hard to say.

79) Last vehicle you were in? my car

80) Last thing you spent money on? TGIFridays last night

81) Are you mean? if I let myself.

82) Can you keep white shoes clean? are you kidding? no.

83) Do you believe in true love? yes.

84) Last funny thing that happened? not sure

85) If you could change your eye color would you? no

86) Who has helped you, or convinced you to change? Cheree, in a round-about way

87) Who was the last person to make you mad? A jerk in a buick that cut me off on the highway today. :)

88) Do you like to be outside? why not.

89) Are you currently bored? nope

90) What are you doing this weekend? Bonita and Jennifer are going to be here for part of it, probably a visitation and funeral, and shooting a wedding on Sunday

92) How many different countries have you been to? just one

93) Do you like celery? no

94) What makes you happy? Joel, music, relaxing, playing piano, Mom. :)

95) What's something you're excited about right now? tonight

96) Do you ever turn your cell phone off? not unless I'm flying

97) Are you paranoid? sometimes... Joel must be rubbing off on me.

98) Are you the kind of person who tells a person when you like them? uhm.

99) Do you know anyone with such a terribly annoying voice? yes.

100) Do you like Subway? yes

101) You're going to die in five minutes, what do you do? Morbid. Call Joel. and Mom. and Muddy.

Well...

You're all going to hate me.

I didn't listen to your advice and told the Red Radish "no" this morning.

But here's my thought process, wrong or not. They want me for the 3-7:30(pm) shift and like every other Saturday. And the whole point of taking a part time job is so I could do photography on the side. However, guess when photography is done.. evenings and weekends. So if I'm going to work those hours, it better be doing something I'm extremely passionate about. Another issue is *if* Joel is home during the week and obviously on the weekends, I want to spend time with him... not be working the only times he's home!

So anyway. I've been in contact still with Community 1st Credit Union... and the lady I've talked to in HR seems to like me. We've had a couple little phone interviews, and I called her to see if the position was still open. She made "a note" of that, and made another "note" again when I said I would love to come in for a face-to-face interview. Whatever that means. I called her this morning before I called Red Radish just to ask her what my chances actually were, but she didn't answer. So maybe I'll try later today.

Anyway. Joel's coming home tonight (!!) and Bonita and Jennifer are spending tonight through Saturday morning with us. It will be our first worker company in the plexer! :)

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Radish, anyone?


Well. They want me. But only for part time. Soooo. Should I take the part-time and look for another job in the mornings??

Monday, July 20, 2009

Hm.

Better stick to photography.

Just got a call from Prudential. Apparently I "failed" my personality test, and do not fit their expectations. As if. I was going to tell them I'd rather be dead than sell insurance anyway.

And just got an email from Wells Fargo. Apparently, "...there are other candidates whose qualifications more closely match the requirements for this position..."

So, I guess they won't be requiring my services either. Psh, that's not what they said when they begged me to stay 6 months ago.

I have an appointment with a staffing services place this afternoon, and then an interview tomorrow morning at that health food store. So we'll see. La-de-dah.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

A mess of pictures..

I came to realize yesterday that I have not posted any photos on this blog-thinger for a very long time.

My sincerest apologies. So without further ado, please welcome....


Gma and Gpa's Anniversary Party 06.06.09
Blair, Joel, and Ron: a salute to Mt Dew


I love this one of Marshall


And this one of Jen and I


Joel and Marshall


50 yrs!

We had them cut the cake. :)


And this is what photo nerds do with a point-and-shoot full of snapshots from Greece.


Joel's clever idea. :)


Todd and Shanna's Wedding 06.13.09
I had to take a few snapshots in addition to my other ones. :)


Shanna and I


Blair and Greg (cousin)


Justin and Toby (another cousin)


The fam :)


The fam with Kayli, Justin's g/f (She's a total sweetheart!)


Me and Katie R!


Making the getaway


And they're off!


Flying to and from Atlanta, GA/Houston, TX over the 4th


We love our heads in the clouds! :)


Down in MO for Brenton's funeral (staying at the Townsend's)
Seth and Sean, the adorable twins



Driving home through St. Louis



Yup, it's the BUICK! :D


Yummy bfast last Saturday..
Melting butter for the gravy.. I thought it looked cool


The biscuits!


Our very stupid neighbors.

Yes. The clothes are out on the line. Like they were for the past week. And it had rained twice. And then they threw bread (?) out on the lawn to feed the birds. What?!

Oh well. At least their grass is green, not like our brown junk. :)

Friday, July 17, 2009

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Well.

Deep subject as Dad would say. :)

I'm just compelled to post about a trick I tried at the grocery store this morning. I have this creative idea* that they should put little barcode scanners on shopping carts, so as you're putting stuff in your cart, you can add up your total bill as you're shopping. Brilliant, right? Or am I the only one who cares?
*patent #800,093,821,357 pending**

So. I took a little pocket calculator with me and added it up as I went along. Did it make me take anything off my list, especially as I flew past my self-imposed budget? No. But it did help me to put back these really awesome fizz-ed natural sodas, and leave quite a bit of other stuff on the shelves that wasn't on my list. And it wasn't such a horrible shock when I went to check out.
**just kidding. But isn't it a good idea?

Random: I saw a red cardinal at 5:30 this morning out of our bedroom window. I've never seen one in real life, so that was sweet. (I know, 5:30, two mornings in a row?! Even I'm impressed.)

Here's an update on the job situation. I was sick of not finding anything, so I went to the postcrescent.com, which took me to careerbuilder.com. So I posted my resume.

So far, I've had about 4 offers to sell insurance (which I've done in the past and don't want to do again), an interview with Prudential (which kudos to them on the speed, they emailed me within 2 hours of my posting it), and a few bank teller positions including Wells Fargo just down the street which eerily had a full time teller position open up there 2 days before I looked. I sent a resume to Fox Cities CU, just hung up the phone with Community 1st CU HR, went in and had a little chat with the Red Radish manager and owner, and poked my head in the door at Wells Fargo to give them a face with the name. I also applied at another bank that I can't remember the name of right now, and have an appointment with Cadre Staffing Services on Monday. I'm in the process of filling out an app to Career Options (another staffing place) for a teller position at a bank I know not.

I've been in touch with All Seasons Photography in New London, as the Marx family is nearly exclusive to them, and Mariah let it slip that one of their HS employees is leaving for school in the fall here. We've had a great email conversation, and there might be something there in the future.

Also, I'm going to be doing a trial wedding in Wautoma to gain some experience and grow my portfolio with Nick Pennington of Nicholas Norbert Photography, who's actually out of West Bend. He's letting me come along, and there might be paying possibilities in the future if we work well together. And before you raise your eyebrows, here's my logic for that: I might as well do something and get paid nothing... rather than do nothing and get paid nothing.

W/e. Just give me a job. And then I'll whine and moan about that. :)


Oh, and we sold our beloved car!! There was a chick that came and looked at it Tuesday night after gsp meeting, and she was rounding up the rest of the money to get it and finally got back to Joel this morning. :D

I'm going to miss that thing. It's bad, but probably the thing I liked about it most was how "cool" I felt walking out to it. Oh yeah. This is my car. Drool, now, because I drive it and you don't. Or something. But tied for first, was how slamming through the gears totally drained away any frustration. haha.


Mmm hmm. Sexy. :)

Finally, cheers to Friday being tomorrow, my awesome friend, Brett (yes, GIRL), from college coming up here next week, payday, and one of the most random posts ever!

"... some form of a bill will probably pass."

Mylanta.

I've always liked Ron Paul a little. At least he has a head on his shoulders. Unlike these beheaded chickens that are in the majority in the Senate, House of Reps, and, ahem, White House.

From the article:

"As far as the Texas Congressman[Ron Paul] is concerned, healthcare is not a right. "I don't have a right to medical care," he emphatically states. In his view, the constitution only guarantees citizens "life, liberty and (the right to) keep the fruits of my labor."

Don't be mistaken, he's very clear to point out, he is in favor of all citizens receiving medical care. "I want everybody to have maximum care at the best price. And that's why I want the government out of it completely."

Well, agree with him or not, even he admits some form of a bill will probably pass. Reports indicate, if the Democrats find support in both Houses that bill could arrive on President Obama's desk by October."


Sigh.

Sorry, I don't usually get caught up in politics on here, but this is ridiculous. Socialism leads to communism, and this is giving me a hard lump in my gut.

And just a quick question for all the ppl who ragged on Bush administration for spending... have you taken a look at the numbers the government is spending now? And what something like this would do to our taxes? Do we really want to pay in half of our paychecks so the government can supply us with mediocre health care?

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Note to self #4290

Future dog name: Turbo

(Just in case I'd forget, because I'm prone to doing that. And then Joel would laugh at me. Like he always does. :D)

Need some advice..

So here's the deal.
I need a job. I need to be busy. I need to contribute to our income. And mostly, I need to get out of the house.

Here's the solution.
Find a job.


And here's the catch.
I've been looking around online (newspapers, craigslist, individual web sites), and there's not much out there. So as part of my curiosity, I looked up Wells Fargo and their job openings. Wouldn't you know it? 40-hr teller position opened up just days ago. Less than a mile from our plexer.

Now the part of me that doesn't like change is saying, oooo, familiarity, you've already done this. You know how they work and you might not have to go through training again since it's only been a half a year since you worked there. And then there's the part of me that says... are you kidding me?!?!? You couldn't stand the sales part of it and you whined every day you had to work.

Now, on the other hand, I could work for another bank... one that might not expect so much of their employees and pay them so little... BUT....

Is it horrible for me to have wasted all my time, money, and energy into photography school (including having my husband move to a wretched area, meaning floods and tornadoes) and dump that all down the drain and not get into photography right away?

Or is it not wasted and simply just put on hold?

I feel like I'm doing myself a disservice by settling for something less than photography. I've been told by how many people that I have more than enough talent, my resume (and contents there-in) are nearly perfect, and my portfolio is not only award-winning, but stunning! (Okay, sorry, little confidence-builder there.)

I'm also a teensy bit worried that if I don't get into photography right away, that I'll never make the jump. And that would just sour my mood for the rest of my life.

So, a little help here, please. What should I do?

Now, you can ponder in frustration, and I'll go unload on the piano.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Joy and sorrow interwoven...

... love in all I see.

As you all who read this probably know, this last week has been the most trying week of my life. I don't usually post extremely personal stuff on my blog and bare my mental issues to everyone, but I suppose I can make an exception. (Yes, I do roll my eyes at you, if you bare your soul on your Facebook status.) I think it's because I'm pretty private about my feelings, which is why you might wonder if I had any emotion as you read this. Don't worry, it's very raw still. And hidden from you. Anyway. This is going to be a book, so bear with me.

Brenton Wade Salyers, 23 years old, the perfect husband and soulmate for my best friend, Cheree (Coffman) Salyers, passed away July 4th, while we were down visiting them in Houston, Texas. As it ended up, I was the only one at the hospital when his heart slowed, and finally stopped beating late afternoon. Joel was back at their rented apartment down in Houston, and arrived just minutes afterward.

They were married last year on May 31st, and shortly afterward found out that he had melanoma spread throughout his body. At that time, it was present in his brain, lungs, and lymph nodes. They agressively treated it with chemo, as Brenton was quite healthy and strong.

By and by, this spring he had brain surgery to get most of what he had left in his brain. However, it had spread to the rest of his body, especially his abdomen where it was attacking his bowel and stomach. They were going to start a new treatment throughout the summer called immunotherapy. Essentially it overstimulates the immune system to fight off the cancer. They rented an apartment in Houston and moved down there for the summer because he was to spend a week in the hospital, and 2 weeks out for the duration of the summer.

We had wanted to see them for quite a while now, and it just worked out for us to go down there over the 4th. Cheree picked us up from the airport on Friday the 3rd, and we spent the evening with them at their apartment. Brenton was resting in the bedroom, so we didn't get a chance to see him until Saturday.

Saturday morning, she was up with him around 4, I guess he was restless and was having difficulties breathing. He'd had quite a bit of fluid buildup in his lungs, so Cheree had to drain it every day. About 7, she poked her head in our door and said they were going to the hospital. What she didn't tell us is that he had tripped over a pillow on the floor, and she was concerned because it wasn't normal for him to be that weak so they were going to the ER.

We were up later and getting ready when I realized that she had left her phone at the apartment. We didn't have a vehicle and no way to get a hold of them and find out what was going on. Through a bunch of phone calls, we finally got a hold of some of the friends, John and Andrea Smith, who were on their way into the hospital. They brought us in, and we headed straight up to the ICU.

When she brought him in, his bp was 70/30, so they rushed him up to ICU and finally stabilized him around noon. He wasn't able to take any pain meds because they wanted to do some scans if they could, which they never ended up doing because he wasn't really stable enough yet. We got Cheree to eat a few bites for lunch, and then Joel and I took her back to the apt to freshen up and get away for a bit.

Joel dropped Ree and I at the hospital and went back to wash some sheets and towels for Esther and Liz and Gary that were on their way by that time. Shortly after we arrived back at the hospital, the Smiths had to leave. Cheree wasn't in the room with Brenton at that time, so I went in there with him for a bit while he was getting a mammogram to look at some of the different organs in his abdomen.

I was waiting outside the room when I saw Cheree come back with a group of doctors. I think it was somewhere between 4:00-4:30.. I can't remember. She came straight to me and said that the doctors didn't think he would make it through the night. I guess he was building up acid in his blood which means his organs were starting to fail. Also, his catheter bag was mostly blood and very little urine. His abdomen was just huge and swollen. The doctors wouldn't have known for sure if it was air, blood, or fluid building up in there without doing surgery, which he wasn't able for.

After holding on to each other bawling our eyes out for a while, she got herself put together a little bit and went in to talk to Brenton. I'm kind of fuzzy on the details of the next hour or so, but I know I was in there for awhile as well.

All of a sudden Brenton got really antsy and fidgety. He started taking his oxygen mask off and said he wanted to get up. He needed to walk around, he said. He made motions like he was going to start pulling IV's off, so I ran and got the nurse, who convinced him to settle down a bit. I just stayed outside the room, because I don't know if he was that comfortable with me being there.

The nurse left and before I knew it, Cheree ran out yelling for help because his heart rate was dropping. The nurse paged something into an intercom, and all of a sudden there were 10 doctors/nurses around. I quick called Joel and think I said, "Get here now!" and hung up the phone.

The next thing is what I see over and over in my head. Cheree and I were holding each other, and one of the nurses grabs her, and throws her into the room, telling her that she needed to be there with him. And then his heart stopped.

After a few seconds, I decided she didn't need to be alone in the room. I don't know how long we were bent over him, nearly hysterical, but it seemed like a millasecond and forever at the same time.

We left to let them clean him up, take the iv's off, etc., met Joel, went to the waiting room, warded off a chaplain who was awkward and took a page in the middle of everything, talked to a doctor who was new to the case that didn't really have any news, and went back in the room to say another goodbye.

We stood by as Cheree opened her Bible and read for a bit. I'm so proud of the strength that she showed. Both her and Brenton loved and served the Lord with everything they had. God gave her strength that I don't think I've ever seen before. I asked her as we were leaving if she wanted another moment alone before we left. I'll just quote her exactly: "No, it's just his body.... I loved his body, but there was so much more than that."

All the tv shows and movies show the height of the action in ER cases and the commotion of surgeries gone wrong, etc. What no one ever shows and tells you, is the waiting. The long stretches of silence in the waiting rooms. The looks from one person to another. The way your body is still and your mind is racing while numb at the same time.

We went back to the apartment then. We just sat, looked at each other, and waited. Waited for something. I don't know what. Maybe some kind of relief from the mental anguish.

And that's when the hymn popped into my mind. "Precious thought, my Father knoweth, Careth for his child. Biddeth me to nestle closer, when the storm beats wild, Though my earthly hopes be shattered and the tear drops fall, Yet He is Himself my solace, yea, my All in All." and then the very last thought of that hymn: "Joy and sorrow interwoven, love in all I see." The joy in their lives, and the sorrow in his death, and yet so much love. Love for each other, love for the Lord, for their families.

Brenton had so much love for others, especially Cheree. When we were gone after lunch, John (Smith) was in the room with Brenton when a doctor came in. They were talking about his chances of living, and Brenton just held up a hand and said, "Stop." He said he knew how bad his situation was, and he was just worried about his wife. "Take care of her," he said. Such love.

Cheree's mom, Esther, arrived in Houston at 10:00, and she got to the apartment by taxi at quarter to 11. Liz and Gary, (Brenton's folks), his brother Shane, and sister Ashley, arrived at quarter to 12. The workers in their field in Missouri also came down, stayed in a motel, and came to the apartment the next morning.

We all sat around Sunday morning as funeral plans were made, memories were shared, and last wishes were expressed. After lunch, they were able to get Brenton's body to one of the funeral homes in the area that allowed for a viewing for the families, since they weren't able to see him in the hospital.

Afterwards, we all headed back to the apartment and packed up all Cheree's stuff. The workers left first at around 5, the Salyers around 5:30, and finally Cheree and her mom at 7-ish.

That night was interesting for us, no transportation in a city we had no idea of and completely at the mercy of the Smiths to take us to the airport the next morning.

Anyway, we got home okay Monday night and the weekend was finally over.

We left for the funeral Wednesday morning around 7:30 and got down to the funeral home for the visitation about 6:30 in the evening. We stayed with the Townsends on the Clever convention grounds. We really enjoyed our time there, as they were super nice. We then left after the burial at 2:30 or so and got back home at 12:30 this morning.

As Cheree asked me Saturday night, is there no limit to the number of tears a person can cry?

Every effort Joel and I have put forth has been more than well worth it, and I realized that there really is no cost too great to be able to stand by a friend in need. But then again, I've never sat in a car for 21 hours just to "be there" for a friend.

I've also come to realize, as we heard in the funeral from Randy Satterfield, that these gifts that God has given to us are so precious. Every person and every relationship is a gift, and it's something God gives to us to enjoy our life.

Now that I'm mentally exhausted and once again, a nearly-blubbering sap, I'll let this be all.
I can't imagine the continued anguish of losing someone that you've so dearly loved, and it's made me so much more thankful for my wonderful husband (who is also willing to spend a hard weekend, go through hours of flying, and drive 21 hours for the best friend of his wife) and all the gifts that we share together.

Just a side note, I do have Cheree's address in Missouri if you would like it. However, I believe she'll be going back up to stay at her parents for a few weeks, so it might be better to send correspondance there.

Here's a big heaping plate of Socialism..

Is this for real??

I read Snig's Spot quite often... she's extremely right-wing, and I love her fresh view on things...

This is a great post of hers just recently..

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

And..

..this is another part of my job-seeking right now...


http://appleton.craigslist.org/res/1249060439.html

"Well I wish I had good news, buuuut..."

Yeah, well I wish you did too.

Got a final answer from Countryside today... And that's how he started the conversation. So. I understand where they're coming from... even though I just want to digress to throwing things. He gave me a really nice compliment and said that I had all the skills and the talent they could ever hope for, but the timing just isn't right... which is why I'm assuming that they've taken this long to get a final decision back to me. He said they've looked through every possible option, including part-time, and they can't justify hiring me on. Darn economy. Darn profession. Darn myself for wanting a career that I enjoyed. Darn everyone.

Anyway. Back in February and March when I was at the Wisconsin and Iowa state photography conventions, I met this older guy from DePere (right by Green Bay, for those of you unfamiliar) who is a senior sales rep for a photo lab there. He's a super guy, really friendly, and has tons of connections. I gave him a call.. and he remembered me! :) He told me to go ahead and send up a resume and he would scout around for me a bit too.

So there's that. And those brochures I made for myself back in February, when I was going to try to get a job from the conventions in the first place... yeah, those are going out in the mail to some random photography studios. Today.

On a somewhat related subject, I noticed that I haven't posted for a week. Ooops. To be real honest, these last few weeks have been a struggle. Like "one of those days" that turned into 2-3 weeks. Chalk it up to not enough money after paying off the bills, finding out we can only take half the new homebuyer's credit because this is a freaking duplex (so our "home" is only half of it...), no job, a husband on the road, super hot weather, a perfectly timed hormonal cycle, and somewhat failing attempts at losing weight (I've been hovering around the same 2-3 lbs range for a month..). Everything has just been blah lately... but...

"Things could always be worse; for instance, you could be ugly and work in the Post Office."
~Adrienne E. Gusoff (Thanks, Alaina, that was a good one.)


This week has started off on a better note. Nothing really special happened, except for my moment's-notice-away-from-tears-feeling has gone away. It's been awesome to have Joel here in the evenings, too. I would say mornings also, but lately I can't rouse myself out of bed to do much more than hug and kiss him goodbye. :)

This weekend we're going down to Houston, so I'm excited to see Cheree and Brenton again.. also flying! I'm such a dork, but I love that feeling right when the plane lifts off the ground. And I rarely have such an occasion to fly. Teehee.

If I was a drinking person, cheers to the middle of the week already, and me in a better mood!
Disclaimer: I am not a registered dietician, I do not have any type of medical training, and my workouts and training are only intended for my personal recollection and your curiosity. Anything documented on this blog is my personal opinion or a learned experience. All images are subject to a personal copyright unless otherwise noted and cannot be used without permission. If you read to the end of this, congratulations.